Some of my favorite calls lately have been search calls from Adult Adoptees. It is always very interesting when someone makes their very first phone call in the search for their birth family. The voice on the other end of the call is often filled with fear, but I can hear the excitement and wonder they have with the many questions they ask. Most are starting the search for answers such as, “Who am I?” and “Where did I come from?” But “why” is often one of the biggest questions they need answered. These calls for me are very reconfirming that what we do here at Catholic Charities Post Adoption Resource Center for new family education is twice as important. I love that we talk to our families about identity, being open with their children, sharing their own stories and giving them all the information they have to answer those questions.

Many of the Adult Adoptees who call us have not been told very much information about their adoption. Sometimes their adoption may have taken place over 50 years ago. I think it’s important to prepare families about what our children may feel and ask, and let them know how important it is to share what they know about adoption with them. If parents are able to answer these questions from a young age, we will have Adult Adoptees that won’t have to wonder about these questions throughout their lives. Openness creates trust!

Magen Duffy
Post Adoption Resource Specialist